Google+ Considerings: How do we measure our worth?

Wednesday, 15 January 2014

How do we measure our worth?

Lovelies, it is my absolute pleasure and delight to introduce you to my guest writer today.

When she's not busy rugby-tackling people to the ground in giant hugs, or throwing snowballs, Christine blogs over at The Mom Cafe, where she writes beautifully and with HUGE enthusiasm for encouraging  others, for sharing of her own gorgeous heart, and in hopes of shining the light of a Love bigger than any we could comprehend. 

I am honoured to call this wonderful lady my friend, and am *so* touched and blessed by her post, written after she read A Body of Disappointment, which I wrote about my struggles with body image. She said that something like this had been on her heart to write for a while, and that my post was the straw which broke the camel's back I had inspired her to get on with it. 

I hope you adore her words as much as I do...

There are countless women out there scrutinizing the dimples on their thighs and standing on scales to measure their worth.  They are desperately longing for the perfect size and shape, while burning fat and counting calories, in hopes to love themselves more and in turn be loved.  They are seeing ads that scream “thin = happiness/success/love”.  They are searching high and low for that equation that leads them to a distorted definition of beautiful.

Oh, how my heart aches for them.  Why?  Because they are on the wrong path to happiness/success/love.  It will drive them through turns and hills and speed bumps that jolt them into a distracted life of striving  for the perfect ‘storage space’.

Yes, our bodies are just that: 
storage space.

You see, somewhere along the journey of seeking those very same things…
 

I figured it out.


Those miles clocked, and sizes dropped don’t bring you joy.  Oh yes, you may feel better, be more fit and look better- and there is most definitely something to be said for that.  But the richness of who you are will never ever, ever be measured by your weight or size.  Your worth my friends, is measured by your heart, and what you do with it.

The body is a temple.  A temple of what?  Of the greatest creation that is unique and beautiful all in itself.


You.


God’s design may have outer layers that when dressed up and slimmed down may look gorgeous to the naked eye…

But I wonder…

Do you think your Creator measures your beauty and your own distinguished worth through counting the hours you spend at the gym?
Do you believe that He sees those stretch marks or bulges, rolls or sagging skin and looks down on you in disdain?

Oh, my friends!  What on earth are we searching for? Will looking good bring us the deepest most profound joy in living?  Have we missed the mark entirely?  Do you believe that angels see the shape of our bodies?  That Heaven weighs you in when you enter?  That God, in all His Might and Glory will say to you when your life here is over…


“You could have lost a few pounds.”


At the end of your life, while you reflect on the days and years gone by, will you wish…

You ran harder?
Spent more time at the gym?
Fit into those size 6 jeans?
Spent more attention on your figure?

I suppose it depends on your perspective.  When you look at the ‘big picture’ of your life, what is most important in the end? Perhaps your shape will matter. 
But, maybe- just maybe you will realize that HOW you lived will matter more.  What were your priorities in your life and where did you invest your time and energy?  Was your time here on earth well spent?  If you believe you were put here on this earth to look perfect and thin and beautiful, then maybe that was your goal.

Is that your life goal?  To be lying in the casket with a perfect size 6 body?  Would that make your life complete?

Who are your heroes?  Mother Theresa, Gandhi, Mandela, Martin Luther King Jr…. Did they leave their mark on this earth by having a gorgeous figure?

Or did they fulfill their mission, their purpose, and their uniquely designed potential?

What’s
your mission, your purpose, and your uniquely designed potential?

3/4ths of this world consists of precious people who have never once thought of toning their abs or tightening their glutes.  Are those people missing something significant?  I believe not.

We all have our temples… and yet, I am saddened by the constant focus on the house with which our precious hearts dwell, instead of what dwells within our walls.

I want for those women who long for a better body to realize their worth and to see the value of what’s inside rather than the accessories that ultimately die.  I want them to see the emptiness of their coffin now, before the years go by wishing and wondering how much happier they would be if they were thinner/prettier/curvier.  I want every woman to see their potential in numbers of people they touch, and moments they embrace… not numbers on a scale or in their food.

I honor my temple.  I am surely not proposing to neglect our bodies.  And I believe that taking good care of them is important.  My storage space holds a valuable treasure God designed in me.  BUT, it’s just that-
*Storage space*

My hope is that when I come to the end of my life, I will look back and see the lives I touched, the tears I cried, the blessings I both gave and received, the good I did, and most of all -

That the time I spent here on earth was used on things that mattered most.

If I used up all my attention and energy on the cargo with which God housed my heart, then the heart God gave me would have gone to waste.

I believe God wants me to work on and with
the interior of my ‘temple’.  I believe that is much more important than fitting back into my cute jeans.


*Rearrange, organize, clean up, sort through, decorate, grow, give, use, share, shine, heal, restore, replenish, redeem.*

Now THAT’S where the beauty lives, sweet friends.  That’s uniquely, and wonderfully ours to work with, improve, empower and embrace.

I don’t believe there is anyone who remembers the size of a person after they have passed…

But many who will remember the size of their heart.


91 comments:

  1. I agree with your perspective. Our body is just a messenger while our actions gotta come from inside.
    A firm believer in karma myself :)


    Great post!

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  2. She did beautifully, right? Thanks for stopping by, Ruchira :D

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  3. This was beautiful, and deep, and exactly what I needed to hear. You spine straight to my heart today, Chris. Thank you. Loving you BIG.

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  4. SPOKE. Not spine. Damnit.

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  5. Chris is a wise, wise woman. Everything she said is spot on.

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  6. Love Chris! Love her words! Love to think of my body as a temple. A storage space to hold my heart. And I plan to live to 110 - so I imagine it won't be a perfect size 6, no. And there will be a TON of laugh lines.
    Love ya, Chris!!

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  7. Shout this from the rooftops! I will be sharing this with my daughter because I try so hard to drive this home. Honestly though, I needed this too! Beautiful job, Chris!

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  8. Kristi - Finding Ninee15 January 2014 02:27

    Wow. This is amazing and perfect and true and I need to read it to myself everyday now, and every day 20 years ago. I hang on to SIZE FOURS in my closet. Why? Because I think that's when I was "best." That "best" is bullshit because as long as I have the energy to chase my son "one more" (ha) round, then my body is mine, and it works. Thank you for this.

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  9. AW! I love your introduction and I LOVE that this post speaks to your heart as I pray it reaches many out there that need to read it, and accept it to be true.

    I'm so grateful you shared it Lizzi!!! I adore you SO much, MWAH!!!!!! XOXOXO

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  10. Just keep reminding yourself that and all of what is in this post- because I am here to tell you- I am in the WORST shape of my life, and I have never felt more at peace and fulfilled.... and LOVED!

    If you ever need a reminder... I'm here. :)

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  11. I just talked about this post with my daughter in the car on the way home from her swim team practice as she was sharing how she isn't thin like all her friends and there are "bulges" that stick out.

    She laughed when I told her about the part where I talked about God saying "You could of lost a few pounds" and being "weighed in" when we got to Heaven... I think she gets it. I know she will need many more reminders as she grows older. Sigh..

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  12. Laugh lines=a joyful life! I'm totally on board with THAT!! You'll see.... when you get that "close up shot" of me!! (someday, right?) :) :) :)

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  13. Thank you so so much, Christine. :)

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  14. I am SO glad I spined straight into your heart, Beth!!! That means SO much to spine into anyone's heart!!!

    My mission to to spine into as many hearts as I possibly can.

    Spining is the BEST!!!

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

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  15. STILL laughing!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

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  16. Thank you Ruchira! I wish many women could feel at peace about their bodies and set their priorities more around the interior instead of the exterior.

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  17. Beautifully written and SO important, thank you. As a teenager with a disability, I often feel self-conscious about the way I walk, so this really resonated with me. I love everything about this post -- I read it twice! Thank you for sharing, Chris, and thank you for introducing me to yet another amazing blogger, Lizzi!
    - K from TranscendingCP

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  18. Yes, yes, yes! I love this. This is exactly what I am trying to live for my daughter and teach her to embrace. Do I want to be more fit and more healthy? Yes, you bet I do. But not for being able to say I'm a certain size. To get off my blood pressure meds. To be able to keep up with my kid and not be the mom on the sidelines. Thanks for this Lizzi and Christine. So important for young girls and women - and all of us, really, to remember.

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  19. She is. And yep. Totally spot-on.

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  20. I like the idea of nurturing laugh-lines :D That's a good idea.

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  21. That's the line which stuck with me most, forsure :)

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  22. Thank YOU so much for it. It's amazingwonderfulmarvellous and people need it. *I* need it. You're awesome <3

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  23. It's completely spot-on. Incredible stuff.

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  24. You'll enjoy it, Sarah - Chris writes amazingly over there, too - this is just the tip of the iceberg of Goodness.

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  25. I'm so glad you love Chris's words :D They're perfect, aren't they.

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  26. I'm only too pleased to share the AMAZINGNESS that is this piece :D And good for you for having the right reasons.

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  27. donofalltrades15 January 2014 14:02

    Great stuff, but easier said than done I suspect getting people to buy in for whatever reason. I became a bit of a fatass myself over the years, but I was ok with it. It was my own fault and while I didn't hate my body or anything like that, I didn't like my picture being taken, etc. and I felt like garbage. I've been running a lot and eating a little better and I feel better at 40 than I did in my early 30's.

    My wife is by all accounts a beautiful woman. I mean she is rocking hot! She has had three kids so her boobs aren't where they were and she's heavier than before as well. I only realize these things because she'll mention them from time to time. She's not overly down on herself or anything, but it's silly that she even thinks for a second that she's anything but amazing. After 18 years together, her body is really one of the last things that make me love her as much as I do today. The way she moms the kids, her hugs, her perfect words at the perfect time to encourage me...those are the sorts of things I'm more attracted to anyway. I'm babbling now...lol. Anyway, carry on.

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  28. Oh babble away!!! Babble AWAY! Your words and response are beautiful. You are the epitome of what every husband should be... to their wife.

    Love your comment!!!

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  29. Oh Lisa- I am so glad you 'get it'!!! I am trying to teach my daughter the same life lessons... I pray she 'gets it' too.

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  30. This- this is what fills my heart. I am so glad you read it twice and it resonated with you!!! Keep the message in your heart as you wake every day... to fulfill your purpose, your mission and YOUR uniquely designed potential.

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  31. Oh Lizzi! You are filling my heart with so much GOODNESS, reading all your precious compliments today!!! I am just so grateful SO SO grateful... XOXOXO

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  32. AW!!! This lady is "liking" you!!!!! I am thrilled we have connected Sarah!! I love that about blogging... it's where the real good stuff happens. XOXO

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  33. Had to! How could I not? Oh how I adore that Beth!! Now with your AWESOME disqus comments- I hope she gets a chuckle out of it... (Oh Gosh- she's not mad is she?? Maybe I should write something nice.... )

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  34. BTW- I adore you. Mwua!. XOXOXO

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  35. Absolutely cannot tell you how much I LOVE this!! I have made no secret that I have struggled with body image for most of my life. People tell me "You're beautiful on the inside" but I don't hear it or take it to heart. THIS spoke to me - every single line. I'm seriously printing it out so I can share it with my daughters and re-read it myself whenever I have a "fat day." I love both of you ladies and thank you so much for sharing this!

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  36. Mrs. Always Random15 January 2014 15:23

    Wow...just wow.

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  37. Oh Lisa! I am SO SO SO HAPPY that this spoke to you!!!! Oh sweet friend, print it out and re-read it often and share it with your daughters (as I did) and take it all in...

    It's truth.

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  38. I hope it opened your heart to a new perspective... no, I pray it did. Please share with anyone you know that needs to read this truth, okay?

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  39. Said beautifully and perfectly Chris and beauty seriously is only skin deep, but the heart that is seriously where it is at and thankful to know that there are others like yourself that know this, too!! :)

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  40. It took me almost 4 decades of life to get past feeling like I had to look a certain way, or more specifically, be a certain weight, to be valuable. I wish/hope/pray that my daughters - and all of our daughters - learn differently and feel differently about their selves from the get go. An that we teach them how to value themselves differently. I also strongly believe that before we can pass this down to them, we have to believe it for ourselves. I want to save this Chris and give it to everyone I come across - every woman - that I hear complain about her weight.

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  41. I LOVE that you get this Janine!! LOVE love love it!! :)

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  42. AMEN to THAT my love!!! I too, want to share it with EVERY one who struggles with this issue...oh there are SO many. (Sigh...)

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  43. This is beautiful, Chris. I love the idea of seeing our bodies as storage space for our hearts. In the end, it's what's in our heart that matters. I love the picture of the angel with the facepalm. Too funny. I will share this, as I hope more women will read it and understand they don't have to look perfect to be happy.

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  44. Thanks so much Jennifer!!! Lizzi's pictures are adorable aren't they? I really hope and pray that many women can read this post and truly believe it. Oh, how I hope and pray for that!

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  45. LOL no, I shouldn't think so. You're both too good friends really to have a proper fight over something like spelling ;)

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  46. Just perfect, Chris. We are so much harder on ourselves and our appearance than others are. Your message is so true, and Lizzi - your drawings just make it even more powerful. I'll admit that I get hung up on my appearance and that pooch that won't go away, and those arms that flap a bit...but in the end that's not what matters. Thanks for reminding me!

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  47. I'm glad you like the drawings. Nowhere near as amazing as Chris' words, but I think they do the trick :D Just SO happy to have this here and share it. It's really important.

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  48. You're so welcome. It's perfect, isn't it :D

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  49. Thanks SO much Alexa!! It's an important one for sure... so glad I could share it with Lizzi. She was the catalyst for this. Her pictures are just perfect, aren't they? :)

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  50. Thanks Dana!! Oh girl, i shrug inj dismay about my flappin' arms and bulging tummy too- and yet, I get over it quickly. I have too much else to do with my life and my purpose and my mission.... :)

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  51. Mrs. Always Random16 January 2014 00:13

    Absolutely...I loved it. Thank you for sharing your heart. :)

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  52. This was great. Excellent choice for a guest post and I absolutely love that facepalming angel.

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  53. Thank you SO much for your sweet compliment!! Lizzi ROCKED the facepalming angel!! :)

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  54. It saddens me to NO end how much we as a culture focus so so much on appearance... that's one reason why I love blogging so much. It's all about the writer's heart and vision- behind the screen. People connect in a different venue, and NONE of it is related to their looks. I wish 'real life' was more that way really.

    I hate to see so many beautiful souls constantly striving for something that - I believe is such a waste. I do hope my message helps people realize this truth. Thank you SO much for sharing your thoughts, Jennifer!

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  55. And He will definitely say RIGHT when you enter- "Ya could have lost a few pounds". AMEN!??? LOL


    I love your insightful and always wise words dear sister!! He LIZZI!! THIS IS MY SISTER!!! (She's every bit of lovely!!! Candice- meet one of my closest blogging friends from England!!! Oh, she's incredibly LOVELY!!)


    I love that you included an important and critical facet to this issue- and that in itself, can be an entire book. Oh WAIT- there IS a book about it! I wish for every soul who really struggles with their relationship with food to read that amazing book my bestie wrote! (She still isn't responding to my emails and calls and never answers the door when I knock. Pff.)


    It can be a really significant issue for people- and you are digging in deep to share much more than the vanity issue. I think many would understand exactly where you are coming from with this subject.



    And oh, how I wish I had this revelation in MY teens and early adulthood too sis... I guess it comes with age- or something. I'm just SO glad I don't have to fight that fight now, and I realize what matters most.


    I love you for taking the time to read and comment dear dear sister. I am SO grateful!!!

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  56. Oh wow! Hey :D Thanks so much for stopping by, and pleased to meet you :)

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  57. I love this. I really do.

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  58. Thank you so much Kimberly. I appreciate you taking the time to say that...I really do. :)

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  59. So beautiful Chris! I love your words, "how you lived will matter more." SO true!!

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  60. There's Just One Mommy17 January 2014 21:44

    How do you do it week after week? Beautiful posts one after another!
    And right on the mark, too!


    No, I will not spend my last days worrying about how I could have looked differently... You are so right -- it is what is in our hearts, how we live our lives, that counts.


    Bless you!

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  61. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Jean. Your comment means the world to me!! I pray it reaches many hearts...

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  62. It's all truth, isn't it? Oh how I pray women who struggle with this issue (and oh, who am I kidding, we all do!) really understand it deep deep down inside.

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  63. AW Christina!! Your kind words just light me UP!!! Thank you friend. SO much.
    Lets make our lives about a much deeper perspective than how we look, oh I want that so badly for all!!

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  64. My dear, sweet SSSF! I LOVE you inside and out! You know my head is a constant boombox, there's a song, by Maxwell, called "This woman's work" & it was written for a woman fighting breast cancer and her body was changing but I think that song goes perfectly with this post. They used it on So you think you can dance... Here's the video, grab your tissues.... My fave dance of all times! http://youtu.be/E1wr42lSuo8 OK, XO, ladies! ~A~

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  65. I LOVE THAT SONG!!! I used to listen to it over and over again a long time ago- gosh, I can't remember who sang it. This wasn't the version I used to listen to. I actually liked the one I listened to better...

    If I can find it, I will share it with you!! PERFECT song. Oh so beautiful. *Tears*

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  66. True words, need to practice putting them into practice = )

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  67. I really believe if they see us live it, they'll get it, too.

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  68. Amen to that Lisa.... Amen to THAT. What a wise thing to say. Thank you - lets most definitely LIVE IT. :)

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  69. Better yet- believe with all your heart that it's truth. You are not only loved by your Heavenly Father but by every significant soul that walks into your life... JUST how you are. Skinny... or not. THAT'S most important, sweet WPB. Remind yourself that when you go to 'that place' of self defeat.

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  70. LOVE this!!!!!!!! :)

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  71. I thought you might :D Isn't it amazing? Chris did SUCH a good job here. And it speaks so deeply. Thanks for coming over to check out her words.

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  72. Love this, and I loved the post on Chris's site as well!

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  73. Thanks Angela. Chris writes amazingly straight to the heart :)

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  74. OOh yes. Well said. Actually, once of the clearest ways of looking at it I have read. Big Likes.

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  75. See? Toldja this was a good one. What am I saying? It's AWESOME!

    Hey, I must've used up my 20 minutes by now (even though this post wasn't *technically* by me...)

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  76. Excellent post and wonderful perspective. So very true.

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  77. Chris hit the nail on the head with this one, forsure
    (And Disqus sucks. Only found this now. Sorry)

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  78. Menopausalmother31 January 2014 21:15

    Incredible, powerful, moving…and all so true. You really got me with that last line. Thank you for sharing your beautiful heart with us, Christine!

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  79. I AM so GLAD you came over to read it Marcia... It's such a significant issue to really dig deep and get to that place of peace. I pray this helps women who need it...

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  80. Thanks SO much for reading it Linda! I am very glad you agree with it!

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  81. That is A HUGE compliment, my friend! Thank you for taking the time to read it. Truly grateful.

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  82. What a beautiful way to look at our lives – through our spirits and not through our bodies.

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  83. Chris certainly has a way with words which gives one pause to think carefully :)

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  84. I am late in responding to this, Lisa- please forgive me!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE that it spoke to your precious heart! Believe it, dear sister. I do pray it continues to speak to your heart on those 'fat days'- your worth is NOT measured in weight my friend. No one will ever comment about it after you leave this earth, they will remember the IMPORTANT things instead.

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  85. Heck yes. I love the image of our bodies being storage space. Just a space to hold something until we move on. If we all put as much emphasis on our hearts as we did our bodies we'd be a much nicer people, wouldn't we?

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  86. Chris Carter9 April 2014 07:10

    YES we would sweet friend!!! There will be very unhappy souls resting in their perfect size at the end of their life... I am saddened so deeply by that thought. How will we be remembered? That is my constant question...

    I <3 U.

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  87. Chris Carter9 April 2014 07:11

    EXACTLY dear Theresa! Our lives need to be based on more than our weight. Our value more than our appearance. Our worth more than our size...

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  88. We need to be reminded of this again and again, so thank you!

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  89. Sometimes several times a day, in my case. I'm glad you enjoyed Chris' message.

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